The Bomb Goes Off
It is a package that was to be delivered at approximately 10 a.m. on a usual work day.
Working past time to go home, no time to think of going home because there’s work to be done and then it’s 8 a.m., time to start work again.
"Good morning how are you did you get those faxes off last night I’m expecting a delivery today."
The delivery comes about 10 a.m.
Before that, things go much as usual. There are notes to that effect. Not that notes are, in fact, taken in the course of business as usual, it being business as usual there is no time to take notes, except, of course, for those notes taken of the usual business. For example, the usual calendar entries, the work order forms, the notes jotted down to deliver the faxes, expect delivery, the various jobs to be worked on, the appointments, etc.
It being the beginning of the work day, there are all the start-up procedures. For which there would be records that can be checked. Logging on. Reading e-mail. Responding, if necessary, to any e-mail, interoffice mail or memos.
"Here’s another set of revisions. They’ll be faxing in another set. Print out a copy of the job for me to mark up when I talk to them on the phone. Do these revisions in the meantime. Larry may have some revisions of his own, so he may be bringing you those, too."
It being the morning, there is the latté, which would be set down next to the computer while working on the jobs.
To the best of our recollection. On the basis of our current information and belief. On a day-by-day basis, with regards to the day-to-day basis of our current understanding. This would have been the basis for our assumptions about the usual procedure for a day not unlike the day with respect to which the instant incident is grounds for the current investigation.
Mr. Sonso goes back into his office.
Say hello to Mary, the other document secretary who sits in the same area. By saying "hello" is meant chatting with her for a few minutes, how’s the family the weather the football team, as interpersonal relationships are important to the wellbeing of the individuals that go to the comprising of the Firm, it being our policy to foster the atmosphere conducive to a non-hostile environment, though careful not to give her full frontal attention as it’s important to establish the priority of the workflow. Mary has downloaded a Walt Disney screen saver which is cute and well-liked by those in her area.
Multiple and alternative grounds furnish numerous bases . . .
We have an oral record of a mental notation to this effect:
Continue in the usual manner with computer input.
In no event shall the ATM facility located on the premises be staffed by a human being.
At some point Sandra probably came over to say that Larry had asked about the delivery. Sandra, that is, another document secretary who works in Larry’s area, seeing as how the implementation of current staffing procedures has necessitated the implementation of flexibility with regards to who sits where and works for whom.
Despite significant catastrophe losses, soft pricing, volatile interest rates, continuing environmental and asbestos claims and reserve strengthening by several large insurers, the insurance industry as a whole posted better earnings. However, insurers continue to be hampered by the persistence of catastrophes.
This information will be entered into the Network by imagining <Ctrl Backspace> imaging . . .
The fax guy, which, it should be clarified, has the official and proper title and designation "Facsimile Machine Operator" (note capital letters), but is referred to around the office as "fax guy," and this is not meant as a disparagement, nor in any way is it to be construed as a term of disapprobation, discrimination or disrespect, as the fax guy of his own volition knowingly participates in this convivial and colloquial designation with a jocularity and affectionate irony not unlike the comic strip "Dilbert," which it should be noted for the record is a regular part of the Firm culture, being included on the Firm’s highly-recognized web site, comes by to ask about the transmission record of the previous evening. This was most probably just after 9 a.m. in the morning of said day.
The terms of this Agreement are intended by the parties as a final expression of their agreement with respect to such terms as are included in this Agreement.
Mr. Sonso comes out of his office and goes elsewhere. To what destination it is not known with certainty by this point of view.
The execution, delivery and performance by the stockholder of his obligations hereunder and the consummation of the transactions contemplated hereby will not conflict with, result in a violation or breach of , constitute (with or without lapse of time or both) a default under, or require the stockholder to obtain any consent, approval or action of, make any filing with or give any notice to, or result in or give to any person any right of payment or reimbursement, termination, cancellation, modification or acceleration of, or result in the creation
or imposition of any lien upon any of the assets or properties of the stockholder, under any of the terms, conditions or provisions of any note, bond, mortgage, security agreement, indenture, license, franchise, permit, concession, contract, lease or other instrument, obligation or agreement of any kind to which the stockholder is a party or by which such stockholder or any of his assets or properties is bound.
Mr. Sonso goes back into his office.
. . . the failure of the directors, at any meeting of the directors at which any director or directors are to be selected, to select the number of directors to be selected at such meeting.
Mr. Juever comes by to drop off a job of his own to be done. This job is of the utmost priority and the deadline is firm, unlike the usual deadline, but every bit as much urgent and high priority as the urgent high priority work for Mr. Sonso. As concerns matters such as these, it should not be the business of this investigation to ask questions in an inquiry into the nature of the practicality of the workflow prioritizing of such a high quality firm as prides itself on top of the line customer service. This, it was noted, was around 9:20 a.m.
At this point it should be noted that the particular operator in question makes a decision as to which urgent high priority job would have the most material adverse effect should she not get it done. And in passing we note that we would be remiss if it were not understood that this was also a consideration of which would most impact her professional relationship.
Inputting of Mr. Juever’s job is also got under way.
Such efforts are the usual refuge of those whose record is inadequate to the task of dealing in specifics that are relevant to the issues raised by the appellant.
Judy the floor supervisor comes by to see how things are going. A conversation ensues re: an adjustment that had not been made as regards compensation. As Judy the floor supervisor will confirm as being said, the paper work is being done.
This electric restructuring "roadmap" focuses on the multiple and interrelated tasks that must be accomplished and sets forth the process to achieve the necessary procedural milestones that must be completed in order to meet the implementation goal.
The phone rang, which is to say, at the particular station, and this was a call from the payroll department about matters concerning the individual accounting of paid time off accruals for the particular operator. The timing of this call can be corroborated by the employee in the payroll department.
"Communications" means any and all of the following: writings, oral communications, conversations by telephone, meetings, and any contact, oral or written, formal or informal, at any time or place and under any circumstances whatsoever in which information of any kind or nature is transmitted or exchanged in any form.
The delivery comes about 10 a.m. It must be after 10 a.m., as it was usual for them not to arrive on time, and this is the expectation of the receiver of the delivery, who, it will be noted, makes a mental note that as per usual the delivery is not on time.
. . . wasteful, unnecessary and time-consuming foot-dragging.
The phone rings, at, that is, the particular station, and it’s the receptionist to say that she has sent the delivery person to the particular station with the package.
At the time of the acquisition, the product embodied the core company technology on which any "follow-on" product applications would have to be based.
Have to deal with the delivery man. Upon signing for the delivery, note that the delivery man assumes a brusque, distracted manner, as if indeed he’s the one being inconvenienced. However, note particularly the weird imposition of the person’s character into this professional and routine exchange.
"Is that you guys’ idea of humor?"
Reportedly he is to have said this and reportedly the response is to have been, "Hunh?"
"Or do you just state that sort of thing out right?"
At which point he, that being the delivery person, points to the document lying open to full view on the workspace, more particularly to one heading of the said document, which reads as follows.
Death Before Distribution.
Particular note should be made of this curiously significant indication.
Hand delivery of the package is thus transacted.
The exact time of this delivery, it should be noted, is not noted, owing to the circumstance that before logging the delivery of the package, as is the usual custom, Mr. Sonso is notified of its arrival by a physical vocal audible yelling out to him that it is here. Mr. Sonso comes out of his office and personally, physically, bodily takes the package himself.
Mr. Sonso proceeds to begin to commence the opening of the package right there. Present is operator, Mary, the other secretary in that area, and said Mr. Sonso.
Mr. Sonso, who is really very personable and friendly, albeit highly professional, is making some of the good natured remarks of the kind and nature of which are his custom whenever he’s present there before the staff members with which he is familiar.
"I hope this isn’t a bomb."
"And what would you say, in your best estimation – to the best of your recollection, and to the best of your ability to reproduce such things – was the sound of this?"
"I would say, with a pretty good amount of certainty, ‘Boom.’"
"So you’re saying there was big sound and that sound was ‘Boom’?"
"That’s right. ‘Boom.’"
"And by ‘Boom,’ you mean a pretty big ‘Boom.’"
"Oh, yes. That’s the kind of sound a boom is. I mean, by nature, a boom is a big sound. It was a very big ‘Boom.’"
"And how loud would you say this ‘Boom’ was, if you could describe the degree of the loudness in any way?"
"Well, I think I would have to say that it was so loud that it reached the point where you couldn’t hear anything else."
"So you’re saying that that ‘Boom’ was by far the biggest, loudest, most evident sound there was anywhere in the vicinity."
"Uh – I guess – well, yes."
Work unfinished, start work.
"Good morning, etc." — Mr. Sonso.
Delivery to arrive 10 a.m.
Usual biz. Make notes. Calendar, forms, faxes, jobs, appointments.
Log on. E-mail. Memos.
Mr. Sonso revs. Confusing instructions. Several sets to be done all at once. Which ones priority?
Latté. Mary. Chat some. Bad weather, catastrophe.
Input. Multiple and numerous, additionally, furthermore, moreover, indeed, etc. Oh brother.
Sandra comes to ask about delivery for Larry.
Fax guy checks on fax record for last night.
Mr. Sonso goes out.
Mr. Sonso comes in.
Mr. Juever job, must have, firm.
Begin input Juever job.
Convers. with Judy about paycheck adjustments. Paper work being done.
Talk with payroll on phone about matter.
Delivery is late.
Recept. sends delivery over.
Delivery man not professional. Makes unwanted comment re: document he sees.
Inform Mr. Sonso of package. He receives it personally before time to log in.
Mr. Sonso opens package at station.
It was approximately (with or without lapse of time or both).
Work’s over, go to work.
"Good working. Got faxed off last night. Delivery firmly expected."
Delivery – 10 a.m. (with or without lapse of time or both).
Noted. Entries calendared. Work order formed. Jots noted. Expectings delivered. Lattéd. On logged. Readings e-mailed. Respondings e-mailed. Dulies memoed.
"Here’s another set of revisions. The execution, delivery and performance of these revisions and the consummation of the transactions contemplated hereby will not conflict with, result in a violation or breach of, constitute (with or without lapse of time or both) a default under, or require the operator to obtain any consent, approval or action of, make any filing with or give any notice to, or result in or give to any person any right of payment or reimbursement, termination, cancellation, modification or acceleration of, or result in the creation or imposition of any lien upon any of the assets or properties of the operator. They’ll be faxing in another set. In the meantime, do any note, bond, mortgage, security agreement, indenture, license, franchise, permit, concession, contract, lease or other instrument, obligation or agreement of any kind."
Operator is chair input.
Mr. Sonso leaves area. Mary comes into area. Mr. Sonso goes into office. Mary does not go into office.
Say hello to interpersonal relationships. In no event shall the premises be staffed by a human being.
Mary has downloaded heaven which is cute and well-liked by everyone in the area.
At some point Sandra comes over to post better earnings. Larry asks about soft pricing. Sandra, that is, continuing environmental and asbestos claims, seeing as how the reserve strengthening by several large insurers has necessitated the implementation of flexibility with regard to who posted better earnings. However, the delivery continues to be hampered by the persistence of its catastrophe.
This information will be entered into the Network by sipping latté.
The facsimile machine operator is intended for the operation of the machine intended for facsimile as such facsimile is a machine to be operated by the operator of such a machine for facsimile which is to be operated as such a machine for facsimile the operation of which will constitute the facsimile machine operation.
The transmission record of the previous evening is intended as a final expression of the record of the transmission with respect to such transmission as is included in the record.
Mr. Sonso comes out of his office.
Mr. Sonso goes into his office.
Mr. Sonso fails to come out of his office.
Mr. Sonso fails to go into his office.
Mr. Sonso’s coming out of his office is a failure of Mr. Sonso to go into his office.
Mr. Sonso’s going into his office is a failure of Mr. Sonso to come out of his office.
However, in no manner, kind, nature or description shall any act or failure to act of Mr. Sonso be construed as a failure by Mr. Sonso to perform the act or failure to act which Mr. Sonso so performs or fails to perform, as far as the performance of the terms of this Agreement.
Mr. Juever comes by. Mr. Juever’s coming by is not Mr. Sonso’s going out, nor is Mr. Juever’s coming by Mr. Sonso’s coming in, nor is Mr. Juever’s coming by conditioned upon the coming or going of Mr. Sonso, despite any urgent, high priority Mr. Juever may have. Mr. Juever’s urgent high priority is not a condition of Mr. Sonso’s urgent high priority, nor is Mr. Juever’s urgent high priority conditioned by Mr. Sonso’s urgent high priority. Conversely, Mr. Sonso’s urgent high priority is neither a condition of nor conditioned by Mr. Juever’s urgent high priority. In no event shall the urgent high priority of either Mr. Sonso or Mr. Juever, or both, be construed as having any relationship whatsoever to the urgent high priority of the other of either Mr. Sonso or Mr. Juever, for the purposes of considering the urgent high priority of either Mr. Sonso or Mr. Juever or both, including but not limited to Mr. Sonso and Mr. Juever.
Mr. Juever has a firm deadline.
Mr. Juever was input.
By no means is Mr. Juever to be put off.
Mr. Juever goes off.
Judy the floor supervisor comes by. Such efforts are the usual refuge of those whose record is inadequate to the task of dealing in specifics that are relevant to the issues raised.
Judy the floor supervisor goes off.
While the electronic restructuring "roadmap" was keying on the primary focus of the emphasis of the exemplary critical crossroads watershed, the phone rings, which is to say, the process to achieve the necessary procedural milestones that must be completed to meet the implementation goal. The paper work is being done.
The delivery comes with or without wastful, unnecessary and time-consuming foot-dragging or both.
The phone goes off.
The receptionist telephonically comes by.
The receptionist telephonically goes off.
The delivery man comes by. The acquisition embodied the core company technology.
Upon signing for the delivery, noted that the delivery man embodied a brusque, distracted manner on which any "follow-on" product applications would have to be based.
The delivery embodiment "followed on," "Is that you guys’ idea of a joke?"
Death Before Distribution.
The "communication," meaning any and all of the following: writings, oral communications, physical audible yellings out, conversations by telephone, meetings, and any contact, oral or written, formal or informal, at any time or place and under any circumstances whatsoever in which information of any kind or nature is transmitted or exchanged in any form, is being done.
Mr. Sonso comes out of this office.
Mr. Sonso proceeds, the paper work of the package is being undone.
Mr. Sonso’s physical, oral, vocal, audible communication being done is, "I hope this isn’t a bomb."
Mr. Sonso goes off.
Time lapses or doesn’t lapse or both.
Time to go to work.
Work everywhere. Work flying around the office. Revisions upon revisions, exponentialitilization of revisions, revisions colliding, revisions impacting revisions, revisions dividing and splintering like atoms giving off enormous exertion. Mr. Sonso transitions from his office in regular installments. Multiple and alternative grounds, the ground collapsing upon the ground, the bottom falls out, the ground regularly proliferates, arguments are made on the ground, the Firm, on the ground on the grounds of the ground falling out from under the ground on a day-to-day basis, a ground-to-ground basis, the grounds stacked on top of grounds in the manner of the tower of the premises. Numerous bases, bases growing on a sudden basis, bases growing on a spectacular basis, bases succeeding on a rocket basis, bases rocketing on a skyward basis, bases basing on a basis basis. Conditions precede conditions. Conditions precedent to conditions subsequent sheer off of the forward end of the inception of the event like fine-split hairs. Mr. Sonso de-offices. In no event – there is no event – in no event is there an event, there is no event, the great cleaving abysses of nonevents open up on the ground on a regular bases, forming a regular variegated striated structure of noneventness into which each and every thing, fixed or nonfixed, nonanimate or nonnonanimate, is accordingly slotted. The premises are in no event, in this nonevent, staffed by a human being, human beings having been withdrawn from eventfulness. Mr. Sonso is projected into his office. Despite significant catastrophe losses . . . soft pricing, soft machines, general softening . . . volatile . . . interest rates burst into flames . . . heat expansion, soft, volatile . . . deliquescing environment . . . asbestos atmosphere –
"This is Mr. Thisis. Could I get a status report on that job?"
– reserve strengthening, reserve burgeoning, reserve bulging, reserve bludgeoning, reserve mongering by several severe stupendous insuperable insurers – Mr. Juever flies by – industry interestly insuring as a hole better earnings. Posted, stamped, pressed, pinioned, skewered. Husked. Mr. Juever goes off. However, however, insurers continue to be hampered by the persistence of catastrophes. The continuing of the persisting of the happening of the occurring of the maintaining of the commencing of the inception of the getting under way of the carryforwarding of the execution of the performance of the impacting of the functionalitying of the catastrophizing is being done. The Culture catastrophes. Sandra comes undone. –
"This is Mr. Thisis. Could I get a status report on that last status report?"
– The informants and information accessors are informed into the system. The Firm enters into the Network. The Firm commits all manner of self-accessing and it is most impactful. Sandra shoots off. The terms of this existence are intended by the parties as a final expression of their existence with respect to such terms as are included in this existence. Judy the floor supervisor streams by. Execute deliver perform consume transact conflict result violate breach constitute lapse default consent approve reimburse terminate cancel modify accelerate – executedeliverperformconsumetransactconflict –
"This is Mr. Thisis. Could I get a status report –"
"This is Mr. Thisis. Could I get a status report re the status report I was just about to ask for?"
– resultviolatebreachconstitutelapse – Judy the floor supervisor goes off . . . Production productively produces productive products. Proliferation proliferates proliferatedly. Multiple multitudes of numerous quantities quantify in multitudinous quantification. Any ones shall not in any ways exclude any rights to any exclusive ownerships of any properties, nor shall any ones in any ways restrict any restrictions of any claims of any rights or under any conditions condition any conditions to any agreements, any indentures, any liens, any franchises, any permits, any contracts, any leases, any obligations, or do any things to prohibit any exclusive privileges to any things. The fax guy transmits. And the sky does scroll up and there appears in the midst of seven golden track lights the CEO, professionally suited on an utmost basis and girt about the neck with a golden tie. His head and his hairs are white like wool, as white as snow, and his eyes are burning. And his feet, like molten steel, burn as if in a furnace, and his mouth runs with the sound of gushing effluvia. And he has in his right hand the lease agreements to seven stars, and out of his mouth goes a sharp two-edged instrument and his appearance is as the sun shining at substantially high level. The fax guy replicates. After this, another window of heaven pops up, and there is the most gloriously redecorated conference rooms. And round about the conference table are four and twenty seats and upon the seats are four and twenty directors sitting, clothed in blazing but not too flashy suits, and they have on their wrists bands of gold. And out of the conference room proceeds lightnings and thunderings and voices and fires burning and again, as if always, the burst of them onto the scene. The four and twenty directors fall down before the seats of the directors and the seats of the officers and the seat of the CEO and worship the seats that live for ever and ever in endless rotation, saying You are worthy, whoever sits here, to receive glory and honor and power and compensation. The delivery man is delivered. And on the conference table is a document, written in seven-point type and with seven levels of sub-clauses. And no man on earth is able to penetrate the document, neither to look thereon. And the four and twenty directors sing a song, saying, Who sits here is worthy to take the document and to put it in on the system and to open it. And saying with a loud voice, Worthy is whoever sits here to receive power and riches and wisdom and strength and honor and glory and blessing and perks and stock options. And every creature which is in the Firm, and on the earth, and under the Firm, and such as are in the sea, and all that are in them, is heard saying, Blessing and honor and glory and power and compensation be unto him who sits upon those seats, and unto the CEO for ever and ever. Saint Sonso comes by. Death before distribution. Saint Juever goes off. Mr. Thisis regresses on an infinite basis.
Time to go to work. Mr. Sonso goes into his office. No time to work, time to go to work. Mr. Sonso goes into his office. Time lapses, time does not lapse. Mr. Sonso goes into his office. Work lapses, work does not lapse. Mr. Sonso goes into his office. Make revisions. Mr. Sonso goes into his office.
In short, the impacting of high-potentiality volatility distribution ratios with impactful high-technology accessing functionality significantly impacts the methodologies of in-person face-to-face vis-à-vis meet-and-confer nonnonhuman interfacings as regards the particularity with respect to the boilerplate conclusory allegations re the substantially identical high-technology core company values which embody the very essence of the nature they stand for notwithstanding the vague, ambiguous, overbroad, unclear, indeterminate, nonconclusive and/or, jointly and severally, nebulous statements to the contrary at this particular point and/or juncture in the space-time continuum, or any disruptions of an impactful type nature, including but not limited to natural disasters, states of war, acts of terrorism, riots, acts of civil disobedience, explosions, empirical or ontological, or any other occurrences, happenings or events of force majeure, or in the alternative, the complete and utter daily and mundane repetition of the cumulative disintegration by pleonasm and hyperbole of that process which is one of the key principles of primary focus for the interest of the wellbeing and functionality of entities who so undergo that process, which term entity, when used in either the singular or the plural, shall hereinamongst be considered to be substantially identical to the terms "person" and "people," respectively, as those terms are used in the Constitution of the United States, U.S. Const. preamble, amend. I-X., notwithstanding any future determination by a court of competent jurisdiction or any government or governmental body or arbitration proceeding which may affect the applicability or correlation of this term to what may have heretofore been understood by the term "human being." Furthermoreover, a material adverse impact may result from an impact with adverse material. Moreover for ever and ever.
Bottom line is the bottom line. Bottom line: bottom line. Bottom line? Bottom line. Bottom line, bottom line. Bottom line . . .
The bomb goes off