Northwestsoutheastern |
41 |
UPRNY |
7 |
Fighting Pacifists: RB Drew Cheers 18 rushes 92 yards 1 TD, 4 catches 44 yards. Sharks: WR Orlando Difri 5 catches 59 yards.
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Galactic Soup Bowl
Pacifists Glide over Sharks
It didn't look like it in the first half, but it was all Northwestsoutheastern in this final. There was little more than a quarter of suspense about the Fighting Pacifists completing a second straight undefeated season and fourth championship. When the Pacifists scored before halftime to go up 17-7, it looked like they'd just gained some breathing room. It proved to be the beginning of the snowball, as Northwestsoutheastern scored on its second drive of the 3rd quarter, then 17 points in the 4th quarter.
The only gaudy numbers were the score. The Pacifists didn't need much yardage to rack up more points than even last year, the second highest score by one team and the most lopsided score ever in the title game. The scoring seemed like inevitability itself slamming the door on the Sharks and favoring the Pacifists, as it required no spectacular performances.
Sure, Demetrius Award winner, QB Sebastian Ophuls, calmly threw for 253 yards and 4 TDs, and last year's Demetrius winner, WR Avery Cunningham, caught 2 of those TD passes. But Cunningham, who would have been an advantage to offset University of Puerto Rico's dangerous rushing threat with RBs Hugo Gurl and Milo Rider, had only 7 catches for 79 yards. Nwse TE Phil Badd ended up with 9 catches for 96 yards and a TD to lead all receivers. That was in part because the Sharks, as so many teams this season, double-teamed Cunningham much of the time.
The Fighting Pacifists pulled a bit of a strategic switcheroo that led to Cheers being the MVP. Cheers carried the ball more than Gurl and Rider combined, and by him it was thus the Pacifists who controlled possession by the rush. His receiving only added to the effect. Cheers opened scoring with a 32-yard TD run.
Despite the offensive exploits of the Pacifists' marquee players, what was most impressive in this game bears out what was the real strength all this season: defense. This was the 10th time in 2006 (out of 15 games) the Pacifists allowed a single-digit score.
They allowed the UPRNY RBs 68 yards between them, Gurl, who had been the best player in the tournament prior to this game, just 40. The Pacifists were expected to dominate the passing game against the Sharks, but the numbers were perhaps more dramatic than expected against blue chip QB Elian Spahn, who had also been impressive in his debut post-season. Here he completed only 9 passes, of 27 attempts, for 109 yards. Star WR Orlando Difri had only 5 catches for 59 yards.
The Pacifists adjusted to accomplish this. Puerto Rico answered Cheers's opening strike with a TD drive of their own, having their way. Spahn hit WR Mustafa Djab, the MVP of the Dust Bowl victory over Swampmush St., for three completions of more than 10 yards on the drive, and Rider and Gurl did the rest. Gurl had runs of 11, 9 and 6 yards, the last for the TD. Little did the Sharks know that was pretty much the end of their show, and their amazing run in the tournament. |
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SCAB Championship Tournament
| November 25* |
December 2 |
December 9 |
December 16 |
| Toilet Bowl |
| Kootsville Tech. |
17 |
| Dunne-Geep |
27 |
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| Eucalyptus Leaf Bowl |
| HPEMC |
22 |
| Dunne-Geep |
24 |
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| Western Semi |
| UPRNY |
35 |
| Dunne-Geep |
0 |
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National Championship
Galactic Soup Bowl |
| Nwse |
41 |
| UPRNY |
7 |
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| Beanfest Bowl |
| Cavalry |
6 |
| UPRNY |
45 |
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| Dust Bowl |
| Swampmush St. |
10 |
| UPRNY |
28 |
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| Finger Bowl |
| Lady Warship |
20 |
| Little Bighorn |
21 |
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| Punch Bowl |
| Nwse |
23 |
| Little Bighorn |
20 |
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| Eastern Semi |
| Nwse |
20 |
| Cretin |
6 |
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| Salad Bowl |
| Cretin |
20 |
| Birddrops |
9 |
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| Fish Bowl |
| Bleeding Heart |
9 |
| Cretin |
26 |
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* Click on date for tournament reports of that round.
Ophuls, Northwestsoutheastern Run Away with Demetrius
Northwestsoutheastern quarterback Sebastian Ophuls received the Demetrius Award as the SCAB's most valuable player for 2006.
Ophuls was the runaway winner this season, after being surprised as the favorite by his own teammate, WR Avery Cunningham, last year. The difference in the final tally was the greatest since 2002, when DeSade S&M quarterback Payne Indiass won by the largest margin ever, 8 points. Ophuls' margin was 5 points. The points are a combination of player of the week awards during the season and the order in a final overall poll.
Ophuls also makes Northwestsoutheastern the school with the most Demetrius Awards and recipients, with five, topping Puke which has four awards won by three players. Northwestsoutheastern becomes the second school to have two winners in consecutive years, Ophuls following Cunningham. Whooperville A&M was the first with RB Curtis Interruptis and QB Keenan Peachy in 1987 and 1988.
Season Honors
Pos.
QB
RB
RB
TE
WR
WR
K
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I.P. All-SCAB Team:
Sebastian Ophuls, Nw
Jock Kitsch, SS
Laurent Housing, BH
Heartless Dykes, Gr
Justin Heaven, GJ
Barry El Graunz, LB
Felonius A. Salt, SP
Coach of the Year: Warren Peace, Nw
Demetrius
Award: Sebastian Ophuls
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Second Team:
Hunt Down, SS
Lou Secks, Cr
Orson DeWater, LW
Bud Wipe, Cr
Bernie Payne, DS
Noah Fence, KT
Arthur Ian Legend, HG
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Demetrius Points:
Sebastian Ophuls, 19
Hunt Down, 14
Jock Kitsch, 11
Windsor Warr, 10
Harry Beaver, 10
Laurent Housing, 8
Barry El Graunz, 7
Howard Juneau, 4
Justin Heaven, 4
Chip Ophuls, 4
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--I.P. All-Conference Selections--
Pos.
QB
RB
RB
TE
WR
WR
K
C
NCY
MVP
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10 Clan:
Windsor Warr, LB
Hyam D. Wahlroos, HP
Clyde Adams, Fl
Heartless Dykes, Gr
Barry El Graunz, LB
Landon Mars, UP
Ioma Landlord, Fl
Lemon Custer, LB
Barry Meihart, RB, LB
Windsor Warr
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Little 10:
Hunt Down, SS
Jock Kitsch, SS
Al-El Bareq Luz, Bd
Dick Monger, SS
Justin Heaven, GJ
Noah Fence, KT
Felonius A. Salt, SP
Leaky Pipes, Bd
Al-El Bareq Luz, RB, Bd
Hunt Down
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10 Pack:
Sebastian Ophuls, Nw
Lou Secks, Cr
Shlomo Replay, HG
Bud Wipe, Cr
Avery Cunningham, Nw
Bernie Payne, DS
Arthur Ian Legend, HG
Warren Peace, Nw
Avery Cunningham
Sebastian Ophuls
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Non-Conference:
Harry Beaver, LW
Laurent Housing, BH
Orson DeWater, LW
Stu Meat, Pk
Orlando Difri, UP
Noah Fekt, BH
Edward Breigmaigh-Hart, BH
Ernest Ness, BH
Noah Vale
Harry Beaver
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| Final Regular Season I.P. Poll |
POW Awards
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- Northwestsoutheastern
- Swampmush St.
- Bleeding Heart
- Kootsville Tech.
- Little Bighorn
- Lady Warship
- Cretin
- UPRNY
- DeSade S&M
- Cavalry
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- HPEMC
- Puke
- Birddrops
- Porkbelly
- Our Lady
- Dunne-Geep
- Holy Grail
- Flubber
- PU
- Grandma Jones
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Homer DeBrave, QB, Ca
Luke E. Hier, QB, IO
Everett Auerhaus, WR, KT
Bernie Desire, QB, PU
Sebastian Ophuls, QB, Nw ⊕
Clyde Heddon, QB, AT
Harry Beaver, QB, LW
Noah Fekt, WR, BH
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--Conference Standings--
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10 Clan:
HP 8 1 0 9 4 0
Ca 7 1 1 8 4 1
LB 7 2 0 11 3 0
Fl 5 4 0 7 5 0
UF 5 4 0 6 6 0
Bf 4 4 1 5 6 1
Gr 4 5 0 5 7 0
MV 3 6 0 5 7 0
IO 1 8 0 1 11 0
Bu 0 9 0 0 12 0
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Little 10:
SS 8 1 0 11 2 0
KT 8 1 0 9 4 0
Bd 7 2 0 8 5 0
Br 5 4 0 6 6 0
GJ 4 5 0 6 6 0
CU 3 6 0 4 8 0
PU 3 6 0 6 6 0
SP 3 6 0 3 9 0
Wh 2 7 0 3 9 0
MS 2 7 0 3 9 0
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10 Pack:
Nw 9 0 0 15 0 0
Cr 6 3 0 11 4 0
DG 6 3 0 10 5 0
DS 6 3 0 8 4 0
Pb 6 3 0 7 5 0
HG 5 4 0 7 5 0
MO 3 6 0 5 7 0
AT 3 6 0 5 7 0
Fm 1 8 0 4 8 0
Sb 0 9 0 0 12 0
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Non-Conference:
BH 8 1 0 11 2 0
LW 7 2 0 9 4 0
UP 7 2 0 12 4 0
Pk 7 2 0 7 5 0
OL 5 4 0 6 6 0
Ox 4 5 0 7 5 0
Pe 3 6 0 4 8 0
So 3 6 0 3 9 0
OD 1 8 0 3 9 0
St 0 9 0 0 12 0
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tournament teams
| Individual Stats |
---Passing Composite---
1 HBeaver, LW, 822.6
2 WWarr, LB, 814.1
3 SOphuls, Nw, 811.9
4 HDown, SS, 728.7
5 COphuls, BH, 669
6 HJuneau, HP, 629.8
7 CIttaway, KT, 24 628.6
8 BGus, Bf, 627.9
9 SDeLord, HG, 623
10 BEsk, OL, 585.3
---Rushing Yards---
1 JKitsch, SS, 1039
2 LHousing, BH, 954
3 HGurl, UP, 927
4 LSecks, Cr, 926
5 ODeWater, LW, 915
6 ABareqLuz, Bd, 907
7 RPott, CU, 903
8 COstemi, Ox, 893
9 LSpowels, Pk, 886
10 DPayne, LW, 853
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---Receptions---
1 JHeaven, GJ, 110 (1416)
2 BElGraunz, LW, 110 (1384)
3 ACunningham, Nw, 102
4 NFence, KT, 98
5 ODifri, UP, 93 (1289)
6 BPayne, DS, 93 (1119)
7 BFever, SS, 91
8 NFekt, BH, 89 (1139)
9 LMars, UF, 89 (1062)
10 ADeLamb, Nw, 88 (1023)
---FG Kicking---
1 AILegend, HG, 9 (16/23, 23.09)
2 FSalt, SP, 8 (13/18, 29.11)
3 ILandlord, Fl, 8 (15/22, 24.68)
4 EBreigmaigh-Har, BH, 8 (18/28, 23.5)
5 FMillmore, MO, 7 (10/13, 27.46)
6 LDoffitter, Wh, 6 (11/16, 22.69)
7 RDucky, BD, 5 (13/21, 22.38)
8 AIchinose, SS, 5 (14/23, 19.48)
9 STurkmeni, St, 4 (13/22, 21.45)
10 ALace, MS, 4 (12/20, 21.45)
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---TDs---
BElGraunz, LB, 18
LPeewell, LW, 17
BPayne, DS, 15
FAkount, LB, 14
ODeWater, LW, 14
BFever, SS, 14
HWahlroos, HP, 13
BMeihart, LB, 13
RAvope, BH, 13
VIMansion, HG, 13
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Schedule (PDF).
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