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SCAB Report

Championship

December 20, 2014




Kootsville Tech

11

Northwestsoutheastern

24

Spitters: RB Doug Wells 7 rushes 107 yards.
Fighting Pacifists: QB Constantine Angst 18/33 passes 257 yards 3 TDs int, 5 rushes 93 yards.

 

Galactic Soup Bowl

Fighting Pacifists solve Spitters, pile up titles

Someone finally stopped the 2014 Kootsville Tech offense. It happened to be defending champion Northwestsoutheastern in the championship game, and it netted them a third consecutive championship and seventh overall. The "three-peat" matches the feat of Whooperville A&M 1986-88, who stole their first one from the Fighting Pacifists in an upset thriller. The Pacifists were upset in the 2011 final by Holy Grail, or this might have been their fourth consecutive.

The score turned out curiously similar to last year's final, with Kootsville faring worse by a touchdown, despite having turned the tables in the 2014 season. The Spitters, after an off-season that saw them steal the thunder from the Pacifists' recruiting, added two of those recruits immediately to their lineup, RB Dub L. Nichols and TE D.O. Durant, and right off become the most proficient offense in the league, and perhaps ever at Kootsville. They beat Northwestsoutheastern 35-29 in the September 20 showdown that was the game of the year and created even greater anticipation for this rematch.

In that game, while the Pacifists' incredible stock of talent was still potent offensively, the Spitters receiver corps of Durant, 2013 reception leader Jack Sorbetta, and Joshua Little was the new force to reckon with, and the Spitters set the pace. This time, Nwse's talent worked defensively, their speed allowing them to blanket the Spitters' passing attack. The Pacifists held Kootsville QB Colt Snapp to 145 yards passing, allowing no receiver more than 70 yards.

Meanwhile, Pacifist QB Constantine Angst, winner of the 2012 and 2013 Demetrius Awards, picked his way through the Kootsville defense with 257 yards passing and 3 TDs, and 93 yards rushing, to cap his college career with the championship addition and the game's MVP award.

Though Angst's rushing was the most significant, Kootsville RB Doug Wells led the game in rushing with 107 yards. Wells was strangely still effective, echoing the regular season meeting where his 48-yard run was the game winner. Here he had runs of 43 and 46-yards, the latter also setting up the last score. But this time it was too little, too late.

The tone for the game was set on the first two possessions. In the regular season, Kootsville scored first and the Pacifists answered and it went on like that till Wells's run that did not leave enough time on the clock. Here, Nwse stopped the Spitters' first drive, which took 9 plays to go to the Pacifist 37. Nwse then took 10 plays to score, every one of them a pass. Angst alternated complete and incomplete passes the entire drive, finishing it with a 30-yard scoring pass to WR Efren Defoe, who ended up with 7 catches for 100 yards. Pacifist TE Lou Stemper led all receivers with 112 yards on 7 catches.

Whether intended as such or not, this worked as a great strategy, using Angst and the pass every play on the first drive. The Spitters' two previous tournament opponents, Bleeding Heart and Brimstone, had advantages at running back, and tried to use the running game to control possession. It didn't work. The Pacifists controlled possession on this drive by ignoring star RB Rip Bonaparte, who also failed to control the regular season game with the Spitters. And this opened up big running plays for Angst later.

The Pacifists forced another punt, then the Spitters failed on a 55-yard field goal attempt by K Liddle Oldman on the last play of the 1st quarter. A 51-yard pass from Angst to Stemper set up the Pacifists' own field goal attempt, from only 23 yards, and K Ewen Mee gave them a 10-0 lead.

The Spitters got to the Pacifist 12-yard line, thanks mostly to the 43-yard Wells run, but this time Oldman missed a much easier 29-yard field goal attempt. The Pacifists then chewed up most of the quarter with a 15-play drive to the Kootsville 5. When they went for it on 4th down, the Spitters trapped RB Leveon Rose on a sweep for 5-yard loss. But the Spitters then went three and out, and the Pacifists ran out the half ahead 10-0.

In the second half, in between two Nwse punts, the Spitters, desperate to get points on the board, tried a 58-yard field goal and failed, but then drove again to the Pacifist 8 and finally got on the board, Oldman making one from 25 yards. Still the Pacifists had kept the Spitters out of the end zone.

Perhaps the key segment of the game came at the end of the 3rd quarter spanning the beginning of the 4th. Set up on their own 16 after a Nwse punt, the Spitters had three straight incomplete passes. The punt got off badly, fell short, but was still returned 8 more yards to set the Pacifists up at the Kootsville 19. Two plays later, Kootsville intercepted the Angst pass in the end zone, and then had the ball to start on the 20. But after an incomplete pass, the Pacifists returned the favor, picking off Snapp, and giving Nwse the ball again at the Kootsville 26.

The Pacifists struck in 4 plays, with an 11-yard pass to Stemper the main play, then the score a 9-yarder again to Defoe. The 17-3 lead in the 4th, after snatching possession from the Spitters in the exchange, sunk the Spitters in a two-score hole.

Then came the nail in the coffin. After stalling another Kootsville drive and starting on their own 7, Angst's passing paid off the other way: on a called draw, he took off for a 29-yard run to the Kootsville 46, then on the next play, ran a bootleg 24 yards to the 22. After an illegal motion penalty and incomplete pass, Angst hit Defoe again to cover the 27 yards to the end zone. Defoe had all three Pacifist TDs, and they had a 24-3 lead.

Wells got the 46-yard run on the Spitters next play from scrimmage. Snapp hit Little for a 36-yard gain on the next play, then Little again in the end zone for the 2-yard score. Little then went in motion and took the hand-off to score a 2-point conversion, to make it 24-11.

The Spitters tried the onsides kick, but the Pacifists recovered. They then used nine plays to keep possession and kill the clock, including 6-yard run by Rose on a 4th down.

 


SCAB Championship Tournament

November 29 December 6 December 13 December 20
Toilet Bowl
Brimstone 21
Slash & Burn A&M 0
Eucalyptus Leaf Bowl
Little Bighorn 0
Brimstone 55
Western Semi
Kootsville Tech 37
Brimstone 6
National Championship
Galactic Soup Bowl
Kootsville Tech 11
Northwestsoutheastern 24
Beanfest Bowl
Bunyan 24
Bleeding Heart 34
Dust Bowl
Kootsville Tech. 27
Bleeding Heart 17
Finger Bowl
Solid St 16
Moonshine St 22
Punch Bowl
Northwestsoutheastern 27
Moonshine St 0
Eastern Semi
Northwestsoutheastern 42
UFO 15
Salad Bowl
Cretin 22
UFO 27
Fish Bowl
Our Lady 18
UFO 20



Tupesus brings Demetrius Award to Little Bighorn

Little Bighorn quarterback Terry Tupesus was named the recipient of the 2014 Demetrius Award, as the SCAB's most valuable player, by the Illegitimate Press.

In historical terms, for Little Bighorn to have a Demetrius Award winner -- only the fourth in the 10 Clan Conference after Laurelson Kudos of Mountain Valley, Howard Juneau of HPEMC and Harry Bastard of Bigfoot -- may be surprising, and at the beginning of this season it wouldn't have been expected, but by the season end the result was certain. Tupesus had four national player of the week awards and finished the season with the top quarterback composite, the combination of rushing yardage and pass composite. In both he surpassed Kootsville quarterback Colt Snapp, the leader in pass composite by a considerable margin, and Northwestsoutheastern quarterback Constantine Angst, winner of the last two Demetrius Awards.

Tupesus was first in the final Demetrius Award vote tally, too, so comfortably won by Demetrius standards, with his total from the vote and player of the week awards. He was ahead of Snapp and both finished well ahead of Angst, who was the odd on favorite at the beginning of the year to receive the award again, what would have been the first time for a third consecutive award.



Season Honors

Pos.
QB
RB
RB
TE
WR
WR
K
I.P. All-SCAB Team:
Terry Tupesus, LB
Dick Hertz, DS
Anthony Kistmi, St
Hans auf der Butt, HG
Doug Deep, LB
Donald DeDedd, OD
Jacques Didjeridu, St

Coach of the Year: General George Beany, KT

Demetrius Award:   Terry Tupesus
Second Team:
Colt Snapp, KT
Pepe Kaka, UP
Ben Longtime, LW
D.O. Durant, KT
Osborn Datway, SP
Efren Defoe, Nw
Jello Marx, SB
Demetrius Points:
Terry Tupesus 19
Colt Snapp 16
Constantine Angst 12
Keith Tudor-Kingdom 10
Doug Deep 9
Anthony Kistmi 8
Grover Knight 6
Richard DeTerd 6
Dick Hertz 4
Hart Burns 4
Tory Scum 4

--I.P. All-Conference Selections--

Pos.
QB
RB
RB
TE
WR
WR
K
C
NCY
MVP
10 Clan:
Terry Tupesus, LB
Hugh Manoyed, UF
Clayton Bellel, Bu
Vy King, HP
Doug Deep, LB
Grover Knight, Bu
I. Cant, IO
Sutton Death, LB
Dustin Klozoff, WR, Ca
Terry Tupesus
Little 10:
Keith Tudor-Kingdom, Br
Art Faye, PU
Doug Wells, KT
D.O. Durant, KT
Osborn Datway, SP
Jack Sorbetta, KT
Shelby Radimed, Br
General George Beany, KT
C.C. Fly, WR, SS
Colt Snapp, QB, Kootsville Tech
10 Pack:
Constantine Angst, Nw
Dick Hertz, DS
Hong Idori, Pb
Hans auf der Butt, HG
Efren Defoe, Nw
Hugh Watt, DG
Jello Marx, SB
Warren Peace, NW
Molotov Cocteau, WR, DS
Constantine Angst, QB, Nw
Non-Conference:
Richard DeTerd, OD
Pepe Kaka, UP
Anthony Kistmi, St
Alec Dick, BH
Donald DeDedd, OD
Jah Macon, UP
Jacques Didjeridu, St
Thurston Quenchable, OL
Eubie Sick, WR, Pk
Donald DeDedd


Final Season I.P. Poll
  1. Kootsville Tech.
  2. Northwestsoutheastern
  3. Brimstone
  4. Little Bighorn
  5. Moonshine St
  6. Bunyan
  7. Cretin
  8. Our Lady
  9. Bleeding Heart
  10. Solid St.
  1. UFO
  2. Old Diehard
  3. Bigfoot
  4. Holy Grail
  5. Grandma Jones
  6. Slash & Burn A&M
  7. DeSade S&M
  8. HPEMC
  9. Lady Warship
  10. State Pen

--Conference Standings--

10 Clan:
LB 9 0 0 10 3 0
Bu 7 2 0 10 3 0
UF 6 3 0 11 4 0
Bf 6 3 0 8 4 0
HP 5 4 0 7 5 0
Ca 5 4 0 5 7 0
IO 4 5 0 5 7 0
Gr 2 7 0 3 9 0
Fl 1 8 0 1 11 0
MV 0 9 0 0 12 0

Little 10:
KT 9 0 0 14 1 0
Br 7 1 1 12 2 1
MS 6 2 1 10 3 1
GJ 6 3 0 8 4 0
SP 5 4 0 7 5 0
SS 4 5 0 5 7 0
PU 3 6 0 5 7 0
Bd 2 7 0 2 10 0
Wh 1 8 0 2 10 0
CU 1 8 0 1 11 0

10 Pack:
Nw 9 0 0 14 1 0
Cr 8 1 0 9 4 0
SB 5 4 0 8 5 0
AT 5 4 0 8 4 0
HG 5 4 0 7 5 0
DS 5 4 0 6 6 0
MO 3 6 0 6 6 0
Pb 3 6 0 5 7 0
DG 1 8 0 4 8 0
Fm 1 8 0 2 10 0

Non-Conference:
OL 8 1 0 8 5 0
St 7 1 1 9 3 1
BH 7 2 0 9 5 0
OD 6 2 1 7 4 1
LW 5 4 0 6 6 0
UP 4 5 0 6 6 0
Pk 3 6 0 4 8 0
So 3 6 0 3 9 0
Ox 1 8 0 2 10 0
Pe 0 9 0 0 12 0

tournament teams

Individual Stats


---Passing Composite---
1 CSnapp 70 339 5 4.84 425 287 3499 149 .675 7 46 888.9
2 TTupesus 97 568 7 5.86 401 264 3303 127 .6580001 0 34 797.3
3 CAngst 90 623 7 6.92 410 258 3206 106 .629 7 37 726.6
4 TScum 70 320 5 4.57 397 245 2988 93 .617 1 27 651.8
5 LJayle 88 469 1 5.33 389 235 2912 81 .604 4 29 622.2
6 WBigg 74 408 3 5.51 424 258 3023 92 .608 5 27 614.3
7 RThat 81 359 5 4.43 395 239 2998 83 .605 7 29 602.8
8 PLooker 80 444 5 5.55 380 223 2736 66 .587 5 29 579.6
9 PAnders 72 375 4 5.21 408 231 2822 54 .566 6 28 556.2
10 KTudorKingdom 89 769 7 8.639999 383 217 2859 51 .567 11 30 526.9

---Rushing Yards---
1 DHertz 135 1086 4 8.04 17 183 0 10.76 1269 4
2 PKaka 127 1011 8 7.96 16 142 0 8.88 1153 8
3 AKistmi 112 961 8 8.58 18 193 2 10.72 1154 10
4 HIdori 130 942 11 7.25 7 87 1 12.43 1029 12
5 JFall-Part 126 876 7 6.95 15 179 1 11.93 1055 8
6 BLongtime 134 875 16 6.53 22 265 2 12.05 1140 18
7 JOffendai 126 868 7 6.89 21 279 1 13.29 1147 8
8 AFaye 102 867 8 8.5 5 65 0 13 932 8
9 RBonaparte 132 866 13 6.56 20 244 2 12.2 1110 15
10 OKiliu 117 851 9 7.27 18 191 1 10.61 1042 10

---Receptions---
1 DDeep 104 1427 16 13.72 0 16
2 GKnight 100 1133 6 11.33 2 8
3 ODatway 99 1264 8 12.77 1 9
4 AGahn 99 1171 7 11.83 0 7
5 DDeDedd 92 1278 13 13.89 0 13
6 EDefoe 92 1198 19 13.02 1 20
7 HAufderButt 90 1080 13 12 2 15
8 JMacon 89 996 6 11.19 1 7
9 JSorbetta 86 1055 18 12.27 1 19
10 DDurant 85 994 9 11.69 1 10

---FG Kicking---
1 JDidjeridu 21 17 13 600 28.57
2 JMarx 16 13 10 543 33.94
3 KSpindle 20 15 10 517 25.85
4 RMussell 17 13 9 427 25.12
5 EMee 20 14 8 511 25.55
6 ICant 19 13 7 587 30.89
7 BuCall 21 14 7 477 22.71
8 SRadimed 16 11 6 475 29.69
9 FEasy 22 14 6 561 25.5
10 WFielder 30 18 6 616 20.53


---TDs---
EDefoe, Nw 20
JSorbetta, KT 19
BLongtime, LW 18
DDeep, LB 16
DNichols, KT 16
HBurns, BH 16
RBonaparte, Nw 15
HAufderButt, HG 15
DWells, KT 14
LBaskett, GJ 13
DDeDedd, St 13


Schedule (PDF).